A Patient’s Story: You Wouldn’t Know, But Work Was Breaking Him
Updated: 3 days ago
Today, I saw a new patient, a male in his early 30s. When I first introduced myself, he was composed and confident. There was no sense that he was disheartened or defeated.
I asked him to sit across from me on the chair instead of on the exam table. I find that patients open up more when they don’t feel like they are on the spot sitting on a medical exam table.
He came to see me because his brain felt stuck. He did not understand what was happening. He felt lost, unable to comprehend or absorb information, especially when working. He had always been a high performer, so this frightened him. He described it as a “block” in his brain, something preventing him from grasping what he knew he should be able to understand. He was perplexed as to what was going on.
I continued to ask questions, and as I did, he began to open up. The tears started to form. He admitted that he wakes at 2:00 AM with a racing heart, unable to fall back asleep. Each day, returning to work feels traumatic. He is stress eating, and has gained 12 kg over the last four to five months.
Then he described his work environment. Toxic. A demanding manager. No time off. Messages from his boss late at night and early in the morning, leaving no space to disconnect. He pulled out his phone and showed me the midnight messages with the unspoken expectation that they must be answered right away. His tears fell.
To me, I knew exactly what was happening. I have seen this far too often. There was nothing neurologically “wrong” with his brain as he had thought. As I asked more questions, it became clear that what he was experiencing was consistent with moderately severe depression.The trauma he feels about going to work - that is anxiety. People describe their experiences in their own words, but in medical terms, this is what it was.
I explained to him that anxiety and depression can make it hard to concentrate, hard to sleep, and hard to function. This is why his brain felt “blocked.” He was perplexed. Just a few months ago, he said, he was one of the fittest people he knew. Now, that version of him is gone. He no longer had the drive to exercise. This is a classic sign of depression - a lack of motivation, a lack of enjoyment in doing things you usually enjoy.
We talked more, and I explained what was happening. We came up with a solid plan to help him return to his usual motivated, balanced self.
I left that room feeling unsettled. I see this situation too often- work environments that push, pressure, and intrude into the essential hours of sleep which are vital to good health. I hear so many stories of companies intimidating employees, draining the life out of them through constant performance reviews and messages sent beyond working hours.
Just because some can function on constant work does not mean everyone can or should. It’s difficult to understand how this kind of work culture began, but it has quietly become the norm, especially here in Silicon Valley.
Good health is what fuels focus, creativity, efficiency, and innovation. When people are pushed to the point of burnout, those very qualities start to disappear. Why push people to the point where they lose what makes them effective?
I saw two other patients today, both struggling with morbid obesity. When I asked why they don’t exercise, the answer was the same: work. No time. Work doesn’t allow them the balance they need. They feel stuck. As a result, their health is suffering, and they’re unable to fully pursue the goals and life they want.
If you lead others, pause. Put yourself in their place. When I first met this man, I could not guess the turmoil he was carrying. Employees often wear a disguise for their employers. Most of the time, you won’t know what they are feeling until it is too late, and then you are left with one less employee, out on medical leave.
If you find yourself relating to this patient, please see your doctor and take steps to feel better and restore your health. If you are not sure where to start, I’m happy to help guide you.
And if you are in a leadership role, recognize the impact you have. More empathy, better boundaries, and greater awareness can change everything, not just for your employees, but for the entire culture you create. Pause and truly consider what their days and nights feel like. Are they living to work, or working to live? And what about you?
By,
Dr Sapna Rajput, D.O.
Founder of Mountain View Primary Care Medical Clinic
650254-6665
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